Artist: Joe Budden Album: Some Love Lost Song: Poker in the Sky Typed by: Nickolye16@aol.com {*intro conversation for first 30 seconds*} [Joe Budden] Just tryin to explain the unexplainable More than tryin to attain the unattainable, tryin to make it sustainable Collectin all the parts, see if they interchangeable Killing me slow but I'm glad it's entertaining you Every day it amaze me The same thinkin that pay me, the same thinkin that plagues me How can I think I'm crazy? Sway me Cause to profit off of shit that aches me is actually pretty wavy Uh, I'm paintin the perfect picture Only perfect cause the imperfections are highlighted The gross currency off of that kinda sickness changes the meaning of "mind my business" Givin what was given to me, so the soldiers come over unsober and call me Yoda instead of Joseph I be like, "Why they come to me for advice?" They should really come to me for a vice I got 'em all, got a counter full of liquor, pocket full of pills The illusion of control, I can tell you how it feels Accounts full of paper and the women I play with All got criminal bodies, innocent faces Come around and we have a ball, could have it all Well I ran out of Adderall but that's a matter of a call Check it, odds is they start tellin me they hardships Regardless, they end up wantin hard dick, awww shit You would think they been ordained Got her legs in the air, she's screamin the Lord's name I'm feedin her more game, more game, more game I started fuckin her mind, that's when all them thoughts, came She keep sayin if I want her I should fight for her My plight for her says I don't know if I'm right for her Even so know there's a fire I ignite for her Starin at her ceiling, seein me like I'm a nightcrawler Uh, it's like she love me but she don't That's where she lose me, that's when she confuse me It's what I get appalled with, can't call it She think I should remove her hurt since I installed it But, I wish she knew I was perturbed too Bird's view, it hurt me more knowin I hurt you Even though it exists I don't ever bring it up We don't be doin nothin but it's everything to us Presently she bring up the past, and it's filthy You not talkin to who I was or who I will be But that's my own assignment You wanna take all of the feelings and the time spent and give it re-alignment Check the catalog, lateral God I self-sabotage, I'd explain further but I'd rather not Salute, on me, everybody have a shot I do it for the niggaz they said wouldn't have a shot But some days are better than some days Still yet here I stand on numb legs Women don't give a fuck that I have these scars I'm fuckin the same hoes that the athletes are What a roller coaster, we argued and we sexed Face in her box, James Harden in her texts Nigga from the Clippers e'ry morning text her "Good morning" She be sleep, he just be talkin to me, my nigga None of this is a pain to see I only care about her if she pertains to me Shit I'm tendin to emergencies, with urgency That urge in me, is my daily fight in her purgin me Fuck hoes, I ain't got time to be sprung now Grandpa's cancer just made it to his lungs now In 2012, docs gave him few months, wild He's alive somehow, outlived two sons, wow So now the observation says he'll die quicker with chemo and radiation He ain't strong enough to even go through operation Know that death's comin, he just in the house waitin So you tellin me it ain't a way to fix the shit Or is grandpa too old for you to give a shit? Let's switch the shit, give you my predicament Wonder how you'd feel if I was tellin yours live with it And it's travellin to his heart soon Of course it all hit me like a harpoon I was in shock and then it was all clearer When he called me and asked me to be his pallbearer I was floored But then the next second was back to bein self-centered, self-absorbed And it became about me, fought it off long enough I could help carry your weight, but I ain't strong enough And why do I have to be? This the shit I be naturally askin me, I'm such a catastrophe See me breakin down with my father in back of me So for me to attend I'm tryin to think of a strategy But I'm happy for my dad, he was incarcerated when his momma didn't make it So for him to get that chance again with you Means the world he could be there 'til it end for you And me? I bleed out through this pen for you Can't carry this around, gotta vent, it's due Cause now, grandpa'll be closer to his wife Have cards when I come, we playin poker in the sky {*echoes*} {*outro conversation to the end*}