Artist: Jon Lajoie
Album:  Fuck Everything (Single)
Song:   Fuck Everything
Typed by: kirenamloh@msn.com

[Intro]
Yo! Other rappers claim to not give a fuck
Well, step aside, bitches
'cause I give the lowest amount of fuck humanly possible
WHAT~!

[Chorus]
(I don't give a fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck) - about anything 
Fuck everyone and fuck everything, what!
(I don't give a fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck)
I literally don't give a fuck about anything

[Jon Lajoie]
I don't give a fuck about motherfucking anything
People care about shit, I say, "Fuck everything"
Fuck you! Fuck me! Fuck the sky! Fuck trees!
Fuck the sun, I don't need heat or vitamin D
And FUCK toasters! I don't need to cook my bread
And fuck coasters! I use a little plate instead
And fuck roosters, with your useless "Cock-a-doodle-doo"
We invented alarm clocks, we no longer need you!
Don't give a fuck about chairs, I prefer to stand
And FUCK air conditioners, I got a ceiling fan
And FUCK the movie The Fan, starring Wesley Snipes
Demolition Man's the only Snipes movie I like
And FUCK likin shit, I don't even like the stuff that I like
Don't give a fuck about not likin all the shit I don't like
Like tissues, FUCK 'EM~! I'll blow my nose on the couch
And fuck my nostrils and my sense of smell, I breathe through my mouth
Don't give a fuck about seeing, bitch, fuck my eyes
Fuck visual perception, yo, I'd rather be blind
And FUCK time, seconds are too short and minutes are a joke
And hours are way too long, they should be half-an-hour at most
And fuck coasts! Don't give a fuck about where water meets land
And fuck boats, just 'cause you float, you think you're so fuckin bad?!
And FUCK jokes, I don't need to be funny all the time
My dog has a tumor and he's probably gonna die, but...

[Chorus]

[Jon Lajoie]
Walked into a coffee shop and ordered a cup
The girl said, "Small, medium, large?" I said, "Bitch, I don't give a fuck!"
She said, "I can't process your order if you don't pick a size"
I said, "Fine, I'll take a large, but I still don't give a fuck, alright?!"
Don't give a FUCK about beverage size options, motherfucker
And I don't give a fuck about liquids either
They're all wet and shit and tend to spill all over the place
Like human semen when I get it all over my face
I'm not gay, I just don't give a FUCK about straight sex
And fuck my dick, I'll pee and cum out of my mouth instead
And FUCK biological functions, fuck the human body
I prefer the body of bat and the head of a coyote
I call myself "Batyote" and I fight crime at night
I know it's similar to Batman, but mother-FUCK copyright
I plagiarize all the time, I do it everyday
'cause I'm on the right track, baby, I was +Born this Way+
And FUCK birth~! Enterin the world of space and time is a bitch
Searchin for purpose in the random universe sucks dick
Is it deterministic or am I free to choose my way?
Did I choose to not give a fuck about ice cube trays?
If I want ice, I'll go to the FUCKIN corner store and buy a bag
Fillin you up and waitin for the water to freeze is a motherfuckin drag
You know what? FUCK the word FUCK! I don't need to use it
I'll replace it with the word "chainsaw" for this chorus

[Chorus 2]
(I don't give a chainsaaaaaaaaaaaaaw) - about anything 
Chainsaw everyone and chainsaw everything, what!
(I don't give a chainsaaaaaaaaaaaaaw)
I literally don't give a chainsaw 'bout anything

[Jon Lajoie]
If there were a contest to see who doesn't give a fuck the most
I wouldn't win 'cause I don't give a fuck about winning, yo
And don't even give a fuck about not givin a fuck
So I do give a fuck... - wait, what?

[Chorus 3]
(I give a fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck) - about everything 
I love everyone and care 'bout everything, what!
(I give a fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck)
I literally care about every motherfucking thing