Artist: Jon LaJoie Album: WTF Collective 3 (S) Song: WTF Collective 3 Typed by: AZ Lyrics Yo... MC confusing... WTF 3 mother fuckers Got more hamstrings than a pile of wings 2012 - Bringing west wing DVDs to a blind date First on deck every day normal guy [everyday normal guy Everyday normal guy here to get the track started My average lyrics are between genius and retarded I drink tap water and watch all the CSIs I put my 30 dollar pants on on leg at a time Sleep 8 hours a night eat 3 meals a day I'm motherfucking content I got no reason to complain I have a roof over my head and I got clothes on my back My verse is done it wasn't great but hey it wasn't that bad [MC uses time machines irresponsibly] Yo I'm MC uses time machines irresponsibly Went back and found Jusad Iscariot in 33 AD Gave him 31 pieces of silver to rat out the wrong guy Then I planted monsanto seeds in dinosaur times Gave Bill Gates my iPhone in 1973 Then I travelled in time to the night that I was concieved Then I met up with my parents and we hung out all night Come to think of it they didn't have any alone time (NO) [MC nausious] MC Nausious up in this mother fucker I don't feel so hot shit I think that I am gonna [bluurg] Why'm I so sick, what I eat Cat food will make expired yogurt taste less like cheese (oh right) [MC cock blocks himself] MC cock blocks himself, hey girl what's up You so sexy we should probably hook up Crawl in a hot tub with a bottle of champagne By the way I have a girlfriend and I think I might have AIDS [MC necrophiliac] MC necrophiliac, where are my dead bodies at Crashing funerals just so that I can get a whiff of that Decomposing bodies are (they're[?]) my favourite aphrodesiac Flatlining gives me a pavlovian erection in my pants Turn-offs include breathing pulses and signs of life My turn ons are rigor mortis cold flesh and suicide If you're not stiff as a board I won't be stiff and I'll be bored Wait what do we have here? Looks like I'm about to score [Talking, Zombie chorus guy] Wait a minute... no! no!!! NO!!! [singing] -You have to be kidding me What the fuck is going on -This cannot be happening I don't wanna do this any more -This must be a bad dream Leave me alone -Why am I still singing? I mother fucking killed myself [MC gets sidetracked easily] Yo! MC gets sidetracked easily back in the heezy By heezy I mean house but not the show I think it's cheezy My favourite show is Dexter that guy is also in 6 feet- under my first experience with death I was just 16 My dog got run over by a truck and its head exploded Like Robert Patrick in Terminator 2 when he's frozen Its freezing in Iceland I was just there on holiday Hold on I think I got lost again what was I trying to say? [MC who couldn't speak in the present tense] I was MC who couldn't speak in the present tense I'm gonna have a lot of money and my dick was immense It would've been difficult, people assumed I was a retard I'll have a serious problem, communicating was hard [MC constipation] Yo I'm MC constipation It has been 3 days since My last bowell movement I'm starting to get impatient Spend hours on the toilet Yet nothing never comes out of it Intestines like polititions They're constantly full of shit I wish my bowell movements where a little more like my rhymes Always smooth and free-flowing It would save me a lot of time Push for hours with no result Not even a brown brussel sprout My shit's like a gay republican It's not planning on coming out [MC] Yo I'm MC invisible You can't see me The only rapper in this industry that can't be seen With the naked eye I won't lie It's hard to get a fanbase When image is everything And I litterally don't have a face [MC on the phone with Ted Danson] I'm MC on the phone with Ted Danson Keep it down Just skip to the next verse I'm on the phone with ted Danson Not now hold on ted I don't wanna be in this song anymore Leave me alone This is more important I'm on the phone with the guy who played Sam Malone [MC confusing] Yo MC confusing wrapping up the song Like a plasticine high fiving (high five and) a helicopter thong I got richochet highlitghts from the fleet fox's knife guy We out like a rice fightin' a vampire's wife's life [MC zombie chorus guy] -Maybe this isn't so bad Better than my last job -Taking it in the ass for cash 20 bucks a pop -Maybe things will turn around Being a zombie's pretty cool -Things couldn't get worse anyhow (get's tackled by MC necrophiliac) [Talking] [MC necrophiliac] Yeah that's right uuhh. [undoing fly/zipper] Oh you're gonna get it you little dead bitch [Chorus Guy] No! No! Ahh! [getting raped] ow ow, I spoke to soon [MC WCSITPT] UUGH! That used to be so gross! [MC Nausious] It's just a guy having sex with a dead body There's nothing (BLURG) [MC invisible] Dude! you just puked all over me! [MC Nausious] sorry [MC constipation] That's a good idea, I should get an enema [MC cock-blocks himself] Enemas, puke, guys having sex with dead bodies... you ready to go back to my place ([girl] uugh (walks off) What am I doing wrong? [MC fatigue: (wakes up)] Did I miss anything?