Artist: Kurtis Blow
Album:  Christmas Rappin' 12" (1979) *
Song:   Christmas Rappin'
Typed by: Lady J (OHHLA.com Staff)

* bonus track on CD re-issue of self-titled debut

[Announcer]
'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house...

[Kurtis Blow]
Hold it now, wait, hold it! That's played out! Hit it!

Don't you give me all that jive
About things you wrote before I's alive
'Cause this ain't 1823, ain't even 1970
Now I'm the guy named Kurtis Blow and Christmas is one thing I know
So every year, just about this time 
I celebrate it with a rhyme

Gonna shake it, gonna bake it, gonna make it good
Gonna rock shock knock it through your neighborhood
Gonna ring it, gonna sing it 'til it's understood
My rap's about to happen like a knee you was slappin'
Or a toe you been tappin' on a hunk of wood

'Bout a red-suited dude, with a friendly attitude
And a sleigh full of goodies for the people on the block
Got a long white beard, maybe looks kind of weird
And if you ever seen him, he could give you quite a shock

Now people let me tell ya about last year
When the dude came flying over here
Well the holly was out, the snow's on the ground,
Folks stayed in to party down

The beat was thumping on the block, 
And I was dancing in my socks
And the drummer played at a solid pace
And the taste of the bass was in my face

And the guitar player laid down a heavy layer 
of the funky chunky rhythm of the disco beat

And the guy with the 88 started to participate
And I could sure appreciate a sound so sweet

We were all in the mood so we had a little food
And a joke, and a smoke, and a little bit of wine
When I thought I heard a hoof on top of the roof
Could it be or was it me - I was feeling super fine

So I went to the attic where I thought heard the static
On a chance that the prance was somebody breaking in
But the noise on the top was a reindeer clop
Just a tricky St. Nick, and I let the sucka in

He was roly, he was poly, and I said, "Holy moly
You got a lot of whiskers on your chinny-chin-chin"
He allowed, he was proud of the hairy little crowd
On the point of the jaw where the skin should've been

It's cool for a fool throwin' out every yule
For a day on the sleigh when the cold winds blow
So the beard may be weird but I never have it sheared
'Cause it's warm in the storm when it's ten below

I said, "You're right it's cold tonight,
But can you stop for a drop before you go?"
He said, "Why not? If the music's hot,
And I'll chance a dance beneath the mistletoe."

So he went downstairs and forgot his cares
And he rocked the spot and danced like a pro
And every young girl tried to rock his world
But he boogie-oogie-oogied 'til he had to go

And before he went, this fine old gent
Found a gift with a sift through his big red bag
In the top or the bottom, he reached in and got 'em
Had toys for boys, for the girls - glad rags

And the grownups got some presents too
A new TV and a stere-oooh.
A new Seville 'bout as blue as the sky
The best that money couldn't buy
'Cause money could never ever buy the feelin'
The one that comes from not concealin'
The way you feel about your friends
And this is how the story ends

The dude in red's back at the pole
Up North where everything is cold
But if he were right here tonight
He'd say "Merry Christmas! And to all -- a good night!"