Artist: Eminem Album: Relaspe Song: Bagpipes From Baghdad Typed by: ssdonester@gmail.com [Intro: Eminem] Aaahhhh... Oh, it's music to my ears... oh man! How can I describe the way I feel? Fucking great man! Ok, let me see... How can I begin? [VERSE 1] Locked in Mariah's wine cellar all I had for lunch Was red wine, more red wine and captain crunch Red wine for breakfast and for brunch And to soak it up an in-between snack crackers to munch mariah whatever happened to us? Why did we have to break up? All I asked for was a glass of punch! You see I never really asked for much I can't imagine what's going through your mind after such A nasty break-up with that Latin hunk Luis Miguel—Nick Cannon better back the fuck Up, I'm not playin', I want her back, you punk This is Hello Kitty bedspread satin funk Mixed with egyptian with a little rap and punk Zepp' and Eric Clapton, Shaft, Frank Zappa, crunk And yeah baby I want another crack at ya You can beat me with any spatula that you want I mean I really want you bad, you cunt Nick you had your fun, I've come to kick you in your sack of junk Man I could use a fresh batch of blood So prepare your vernacular for Dracula acupuncture [CHORUS] Bagpipes from Baghdad When will it ever cease For Pete's sakes he's crazy to say the least Bagpipes from Baghdad What's goin through my mind Half the time when I rhyme we're blowin up like Bagpipes from Baghdad Somebody turn the vacancy sign on Cause I'm gone, blowing up my Bagpipes from Baghdad I run the streets and act Like a madman holdin a glad bag [VERSE 2] You can be a permanent fixture in my lyrical mixture I'm the miracle whip... trickster My sig-nature sound when a tube of lipstick's around I'm bound to put it on in an instant, wow man What an ensemble, what an assortment of pharma- -ceuticals this beautiful pill dust in my palm, my cuticles get residue just from touchin the bottle Never knew I could remind me so much of my momma I'll cut ya like Dahmer, pull the butcher knife on ya The size of a sword boy I'm like the fuckin red sonja Get it stuck in your cornea, nice knowin ya Norman Your so fuckin annoyin, drop the shovel boy You don't know what the fuck you're doin I ain't playin no fuckin more Nick Cannon you prick I wish you luck with the fuckin whore Every minute there's a sucker born, snuck up on Malachi made the motherfucker suck on a shuck of corn Chaka, Chaka Khan, Chaka Kahn Hit Jason in the face with a hockey puck and tell em it's fuckin on Man what the fuck are ya doin You're runnin over the snowblower with the lawnmower Blowin your bagpipes from Baghdad [REPEAT CHORUS] [VERSE 3] In the bed with two brain dead lesbian vegetables I bet you they become heterosexual Nothing will stop me from molestin' you Titty-fuckin' you til' your breast nipple flesh tickles my testicles Is what they said to the two conjoined twins How's it going girlfriends, you need a boyfriend You need some ointment, just set up an appointment Who's gonna see the doctor first, we'll do a coin flip I just got my one-year sobriety coin chip When the bad get goin, how bad does the going get Baby you shouldn't have any trouble rubbin groins wit Each other especially when you're joined at the hip I'm going to get the needle and thread from the sewing kit An attempt to separate 'em and stitch 'em back at the loin shit Lure the little boy with the chocolate chips ahoy! chip- Cookie lookie even took me a polaroid flick [REPEAT CHORUS] [OUTRO] Hghum-day-li-laaa-aaa-aaa-aaa-aa-aah-aah {*repeat 4X*}